Bitter-Sweet

What a busy week!  I've had very little time to think of the fact that I'll be dropping my son, Kalten (Call- ten) off to go on a church mission for two years.  That might be good or I'd be in tears constantly.  I have no doubt that once we hit the car the tears will come, and more than once.  Sometimes out of pride.  I'm just so proud of my 19 year old that has chosen to serve the Lord for two years before he worries about himself.  I am proud of a son who loves the Lord.  A typical boy of this age would usually be concerned about girls, college, career, video games etc.  I think it's rare to find a young man who loves the Lord so much that he's willing to put his own life on hold to serve others.  The Savior taught, "When you are in the service of your fellow beings you are only in the service of your God."  He also taught, "For whosoever shall save his life shall lose it, but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it."  When he returns I know his life will be much richer because of the things he finds in himself and those things that he learns that will enrich and strengthen him.

I will also cry tears because two years is a long time.  I love him so much!  We've been very close from day one.  He'll be the first to tell you he's a mama's boy.  I do feel like part of me is getting ready to detach a leg or something.  He's part of me.  Yes, two years feels like forever.  Speaking of forever, I have no doubt that us giving him up for this two years will help us on our path to being a forever family.

I will also cry tears because of the unknown.  He really doesn't need me around to take care of him anymore but I still worry about all of my children's safety.  For some reason this scares me.  If something happened to him on his mission I wouldn't see him again in this life.  I can't think about it much more than that.  My heart may explode.  But I do find comfort in knowing that a prophet parent once felt the same, Mosiah 28: 5-7 "And it came to pass that they did plead with their father many days that they might go up to the land of Nephi.  And king Mosiah went and inquired of the Lord if he should let his sons go up among the Lamanites to preach the word.  And the Lord said unto Mosiah:  Let them go up, for many shall believe on their words, and they shall have eternal life; and I will deliver thy sons out of the hands of the Lamanites."
Mosiah too was nervous for his sons to go on a mission.  For those who aren't members of our church it's helpful to know that the sons of Mosiah were Nephites,  Lamanites were their enemies and their desire up to this point was to rid the world of Nephites.  King Mosiah had much more reason to worry than I do.  I would imagine the people in Ohio are wonderful and will help to take care of my son.  It does warm my heart the sentence spoken to Mosiah, "Let them go up, for many shall believe on their words, and they shall have eternal life: and I will deliver thy sons out of the hands of the Lamanites."  My son will be protected.

My emotions are swimming near the surface.  Most are amazingly good emotions.  I love the Lord, I'm grateful that this son of mine does too.  All our lives will be blessed by his service in sharing this love with others.  Does it get better than this?  I doubt it.